That's right: Fist Bumps. Better get with the program McCain. This generation is all about using a computer and Fist Bumps, but we digress, and now return you to our regular Olympic roasting of China.

We're sorry, but Gilbert Gottfried wasn't available as a guest commentator, so you'll have to just accept these words from our 14-year-old Korean neighbor Gerald...BTW, he is a US citizen.

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Hey Guys! It's Gerald!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I'm Kooooooooorean, bitches. Anyway, here's my question:

Which country adopts the Fist Bump, and which doesn't? First, let's look at the team's most likely to adopt the good ole USA Fist Bump.*

1) Britain

You know these blimey bastards are with us no matter what we do. Odds are they'll try to reach across the aisle and "bump" an American or two. Hint to Americans: Don't let 'em. These are the British. They have weird hair, bad teeth and are likely to have life-size statues of Margaret Thatcher in their living rooms. Did we mention the horrible brie cheese and pigeon fetish?

2) USA

That's right. It's odd to have to adopt our own custom, but we feel it's bound to happen. Note to selves: Remove rings.

And here are out two odds on favs NOT TO adopt the fist bump.

1) Russia

Because, really, who has time to adopt a Fist Bump when you've got a war going on. Bravo, Russia, bravo! You're definitely Putin the Olympian "One World, One Dream" theme to excellent use.

2) China

Remember Grass Hopper: Never bite the hand that feed you. Nor the seal penis. That was a joke. I just like saying: "SEAL PENIS." I'm not sure how it would taste, the SEAL PENIS, but I'm pretty certain there's as much of a chance of a Chinaman/woman adopting a Fist Bump, as there is of one of our boy's eating, well, SEAL PENIS. As long as he's not Korean.

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Legend has it that NBA TV anchor Fred "Mad Dog" Carter started using the bump when he played for the Baltimore Bullets in 70s. The other legend, well, we have evidence below, so we're kind of gonna go with them: The Wonder Twins!